The World may ultimately remember Casey Kasem for his charm, talent, and humanity spanning a remarkable career in radio top 40, but thanks to “Despicable Me” Jean Kasem (aka “I dream of Jeannie”), it may recall one of the most despicable public displays of hatred between the “new wife” (well, 1980..which leads me to question just how many decades Casey Kasem has had dementia) and his adult children. Does it always take 2 to tango or was this bizarre woman the over the top drama queen whose “toddler-aged” maturity kept the drama going 24/7?
It’s shameful that details of person’s most intimate, private life end up on display at the Guggenheim before they have passed away. It results in a nightmare circus scenario where dignity is cast aside in favor of life in a fishbowl. But, if nothing else, the behavior of his feuding family members brought “end of life” issues front and center and made us think about things we simply don’t want to address. These issues are frequently left undone and thrust upon the lap of someone who is in no position to carry the weight of the choice you have forced them to make because you didn’t.
LEWD BODY DEMENTIA
Kasey is the father of 4 adult children (3 from a previous marriage and Liberty Kasem, age 22). He was diagnosed (incorrectly) with Parkinson’s Disease in 2007 and ultimately deemed to have Lewd body dementia. Lewd body dementia is the most misdiagnosed form of dementia. Like Alzheimer’s, confusion and memory loss are present, but visual hallucinations, severe sleep disruptions, fluctuating alertness and problems with movement are also symptoms.
ADVANCED DIRECTIVE TO KERRI
As Casey’s dementia progressed, so did sepsis. Despite his 1980 marriage to Jean, Kasem granted Kerri the right to determine his ultimate fate via advanced directive in 2007. The nasty feud would ultimately come to a head in the fall of 2013, when Kerri, Julie, and Mike staged a protest outside of their father’s home, frustrated by Jean’s efforts to block all contact between Casey and his children. The snub of the POA apparently did not go unnoticed by Jean. Jean later entered a confidential settlement with Mike and Julie (so that they could see their father). Kerri refused and sued Jean for medical conservatorship.The Judge initially denied the application, finding that Casey was well cared for by Jean, but reversed his decision later, permitting Kerri to remove hydration and feeding pursuant to the 2007 Advanced Directive, granting Kerri the right to make this decision if Casey were terminal.
THE TWIGHLIGHT ZONE
It was at this point that everything took a “twighlight zone” bizarre turn– as Kasem was reported missing. Jean Kasem abruptly removed her husband from the Santa Monica nursing home where he was being treated–along with the medical equipment attached.
Kerri’s Facebook post stated:
“I believe my father’s wife fled the country (or possibly went to an Indian Reservation) with my Dad because she knew I would win in court today,” Kerri Kasem said in a Facebook post. “The judge ordered, Adult Protective Services, the PVP Attorney and the police to look for him. Please pray that he is safe.” His daughters filed a missing persons report with police, triggering an interstate lookout for Kasem. Sheriff’s deputies in Kitsap County, Washington, located him at a friend’s home there a day later. After staying 40 minutes and determining that Kasem was alert, not in distress and was receiving appropriate care, the deputies left.
Los Angeles County Superior Judge Daniel Murphy temporarily expanded Kerri Kasem’s powers over her ailing father at a May 24 hearing. The judge also said that he could not “travel anywhere without a court order and until the doctor examines him and gives him clearance for a journey.” Kerri Kasem got the judge’s approval to visit her father for an hour.
“Shame on these children,” Jean Kasem told reporters after the hearing. With more theatrics, she then played an audio recording of what sounded like a groaning man, saying the moaning came from her husband when he heard about the court activity. “He’s crying,” she said. Jean Kasem’s anger at her stepchildren boiled over as paramedics arrived at the home in Washington where she and her husband were staying to carry him to a hospital on June 1. She initially appeared to refuse to let paramedics into the home.
RAW MEAT FOR “DOGS!”
As her ailing husband was loaded into an ambulance, she stormed down a driveway and tossed a package of hamburger meat near Kerri Kasem. While referring to King David of the Bible, she said she was throwing the meat at “the dogs.” Kasem was admitted to St. Anthony Hospital, where he was treated with antibiotics through IVs, blood pressure support medicine and care for his bed sores. His condition was listed as critical. Jean Kasem’s lawyer filed a declaration in the Kitsap County court on June 4 attacking Kerri Kasem, claiming she is a member of the Church of Scientology–a lie according to Kerri’s camp.
All of Kasem’s children, his brother and his wife gathered at St. Anthony’s Hospital on Friday, preparing to say goodbye. Kasem “won’t be with us much longer,” and despite their battle, hoped that Jean and Liberty would join them for their father’s sake. “If he opens his eyes, I want my dad just once to see everyone standing around him, putting our differences aside and let him know how much he is loved by everyone, including Jean and Liberty,” she said.
Their brief hopes were quickly dashed when Jean appeared in Court, accusing Kerri of being a Godless woman who pursued her own father’s death to cash in her two million dollar insurance policy on his life. While Jean briefly convinced the Judge to reinstate hydration and nutrition, it was short-lived as the Judge ordered it removed again upon reviewing the medical records and being convinced that Casey was at the end. The tug of war ended Father’s Day when Kasem passed away at the age of 82.
THE MIRROR HAS TWO FACES?
For Kerri, Julie and Mike, their dispute with Jean was about love–a claim Jean denies, pointing to Casey’s fortune as the sole reason. Reaction? Speechless momentarily, but a mirror comes to mind because almost without exception, projection is a work in a person consumed by greed when he or she accuses someone else of it. Jean and Kasey were married 33 long years, but one thing is certain–she never went without during those years. So, who is the greedy one in the equation? When a man dies with an estate valued at $80 million, is there really a problem sharing the wealth? Nevertheless, the moral of this awful soap opera is that even the best laid plans fail, but we still have to try.
BRAVE NEW WORLD
National statistics have consistently revealed that we are living in a “brave new World,” where tech explosions in medicine have created an entirely foreign dilemma for retirees and boomers…what to do with the next 20 or 30 years of your existence? Pew Research indicates that 10,000 boomers per day turn 65 and this generation will be 20% of the total U.S. population by 2050, according to the National Center on Elder Abuse. “We’re in the midst of a longevity revolution,” said Ellen Goodman, co-founder and director of The Conversation Project. “We now live 30 years longer than we did 100 years ago. Sixty is not the new 50; 60 is the caregiver of the 85 year old.”
Eighty-five-year-olds today are driving, playing tennis and going to book clubs. But, not all 85 year olds are so fortunate and boomers are also caring for ill parents for potentially a decade or more. Add the elder looting epidemic to the equation and the enormity of the problem begins to take shape.
BEST LAID PLANS OF MICE AND MEN
Life is expensive in 2014 and we should all get very worried with the State of affairs in guardianship. The cottage industry of white collar criminals are busy making plans of their own, crunching the numbers. A generation that has lived “high on the hog,” deep in debt, to impress the neighbors is suddenly faced with their own mortality and caring for their ill parents–something they did not plan for. Consider that 13% of the Nation’s population controls 80% of the Country’s wealth and it hardly takes a genius to anticipate where all of this is going–it’s not good.
It suddenly makes perfect sense to me why my grandparents lived frugally and did not want people knowing they had money. But, at least their bankers were honest men back then. Today, you can’t even trust your banker usually–as evidenced by the wealthy clients bankers and lawyers are now referring for court initiated guardianship–right after doing their estate planning. While the assumption behind estate planning is that your plans will be honored by the Courts when the time comes, this is not always the case.
In the pit of morality that is “probate court,” I wonder if your odds are 50/50; yet, the stakes are simply too high to not do it anyway. Luann Anderson recently observed the knack attorneys have for creating industries to benefit themselves–something I have witnessed first hand in the past 15 years time and time again. When I graduated law school, medical malpractice was “hot” with large jury verdicts. The practice came to a screeching halt by Article 4590i–a Statute which flatlined claims against Physicians in Texas for all but the most egregious negligence.
Toxic Tort claims filled the void and business was booming with 95% of the claims bogus–but sufficient motivation for petrochemical companies to pay lawyers to go away. Simple math reveals that the attorneys were the only true beneficiaries of these claims, but if 100 workers sue 100 defendants and get $1000 from each defendant, the settlement is a whopping $10,000,000. The Lawyers got 40%–each time they filed a frivolous case. It was demoralizing to work in a legal “racket,” even knowing I was on the right side of the dispute. Thankfully, a federal judge indicted a few radiologists and the Legislature stepped in again with HB4 and it was over.
For the next 30 years, experts believe that ElderLaw will rise to the forefront of the practice of law, simply due to the demographics of our population. According to the Ex-Exec. Director for the National Guardianship Assn, “there is money to be had in guardianship and we need to go get it!” Everyone hold your wallets!
END OF LIFE PLANNING
I can hardly think of a topic I would prefer to discuss less and even if your wishes are not honored, I still believe that everyone should take the time to make “end of life” decisions and execute documentation that answers the “what if’s.” Being a guardianship/probate attorney in 2014 is enough to jade anyone. Corruption has a way of affecting your entire perspective.
I have seen such injustice the past two years, I was actually surprised when I heard that a local probate Judge’s rulings were exactly what they were supposed to be–by law and the Durable Powers of Attorney granted. It’s an evolving situation that is always subject to change until the case concludes, but thus far, I must admit, I am relieved to see the pendulum swing the other direction.
So, my recommendation is expect the worst, but prepare for the best. Texas Advocates are making unprecedented headway in Austin. Countless horror stories were recounted live before the Sunset Review Board this week–something the media is taking note of. Alternatives to guardianship such as supported decision-making, are becoming possible as people of greater influence join our ranks, crying foul.
The most important thing you can do is educate yourself FIRST about DNR’S (do not resusitate), Health Care Proxies, Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care, and Living wills. Learn what they are, what they do, and whether you need one BEFORE you visit an estate planning attorney. Seniors should write down specific instructions about their end-of-life care and identify the designated health care agent in a document called a durable power of attorney for health care. The written record ultimately becomes a gift to family members, since it eliminates the guessing game. Know the particular laws in your State, as some States have a pecking order (wife, kids) while in others, a patient’s tending physician is left to determine who will be the best decision-maker. Please contact us if you need forms or simply wish to ask questions of an attorney. In the interim, the following links are great resources for standard documents:
FORMS
2014 Durable POA for Medical Decisions Texas